It is five o'clock on Monday evening. Storms are rolling in and the house is suddenly dark. I know something is wrong, but my joy at seeing rain after the year long drought has temporarily fogged my mind. As the rain strikes against the skylights in pellets and forms a river of water plunging over the gutters, I suddenly realize that I am starved...starved for waffles.
This notion surprises me, as I'd normally select pancakes over waffles. But as the thunder roars and the lightening streaks across the sky, I know in my heart that only a frozen mini waffle is going to resolve this gastronomic craving. Hmmm...there in the freezer are three carefully wrapped rounds of organic mini waffles left over from Christmas. I sniff the bag and then shake it for ice crystals. The waffle gods are with me.
I can't wait to let them thaw, so I carefully zap them in the microwave. Then begins the precision toasting. In reality, I should have ONE four-part waffle. But, I'm craving waffles, so I opt for two. Then with a stroke of genius, I realize that if I tear apart the third waffle, I can actually toast all three waffles at the same time.
While all this is taking place, I decide to pop some bacon in the microwave. Just a little protein to go with all those carbs. Out with the crispy, hot bacon and time to heat up the real maple syrup.
Usually, I allot myself about 2 tablespoons, but today I pour a generous 1/4 cup. The waffles pop-up from their first toasting and the syrup gets a 20 second heat while the waffles get a tiny bit crispier. I'm positively salivating. I just need to hold off long enough to get them buttered. That would be extremely well buttered. Trying to be more judicious about the syrup usage, I try pouring a tiny bit on the waffle bite. It is not doing the trick. I want and need more syrup. I pour on half the maple goodness over the waffles and try again. Better, but it still leaves me longing. I upend the pitcher. My plate is now swimming with syrup. As I cut off chunks of waffle I can literally dunk them in the gooey mess. Now my waffle to syrup ratio is way out of whack. By the time I'm down to the last few bites, I have to spin the waffle through the syrup and pop it in my mouth really fast before I'm covered in sticky drips. Speaking of sticky drips, I spot a glistening blob of syrup running down the side of my little pitcher. I look left and right and then eradicate it with the tip of my tongue...the benefit of being home alone.
The bacon has vanished along with the three waffles. All that remains is a sticky plate. If I was really rude, I could swipe across it with my finger and get the last bits of syrup...which I do. I have no apologies. I have been to the dark (sweet) side and I loved it! Did I really crave waffles or was it the maple syrup? Who cares! Now to hide the evidence before PARTNER gets home...