Fashion Plate

If you like Texas Jot, please take a look at my other blog, Fashion Plate. It is the home of my handmade retro Barbie clothes and lots of delicious recipes from my cookbooks.

Monday, March 1, 2010

Geriatric Demographics

ONE (among other things) is involved with food product research. I would love to be interviewed or participate on a panel, but it seems I'm the wrong demographic. I can't imagine why companies are not interested in my grocery buying habits, as I'm a member of the largest segment of the population...old people.

While food companies may not be interested in me, the "elder" catalog companies are deluging me with offers for things I don't want and hope I never need. I had no idea there were so many parts of the body that required support from elasticized bandages. I can purchase magnetic jewelry, ear canal cleaners and various products for the skin which are purported to bleach, plump and remove wrinkles.

The most curious feature of these catalogs is that they all seem to be marketing something they refer to as "sexual health." I'm having a difficult time figuring out just what a melt-in-your-mouth strawberry flavored POWER STRIP has to do with health, but obviously the editors felt it relevant enough to devote six pages of their catalog to this category. I guess you are supposed to watch the "seduce the mind and the body will follow" DVD and then imbibe in a "healthy" dose of such tempting products as:

Stay lasts for hours!


Tingle Gel

Super-Primal pheromones

or a device providing 7 ways to "aah-mazing pleasure"

Since folks thought I had made up the kitty litter cake, I will reassure you the the cake was real and so are the catalogs. I'm just trying to figure out what I have done to deserve being bombarded by this garbage. I think my milestone birthday has become a millstone.

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